Let Him Be Dad!

My husband, Robert, tends to be a quite person, but there are times when his words linger with me and I cannot help but reflect on them.

Our son is a momma’s boy—I am the one to do everything for him. Not because Robert doesn’t want to, but rather Tobias doesn’t want him too.

Life would be so much easier if the kid would let someone other than me change him! 😛

Last night Tobias decided he wanted to cuddle on the couch with his daddy, and it was the sweetest moment. I was crossing the room about to sit on the couch to enjoy the family time when my husband stopped me.

“Don’t take this from me,” he said.

That was enough to stop me.

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For a split, second I wanted to get upset because I was tried and wanted to relax with the rest of them, but then I understood.

The reality is, if I had sat on the couch Tobias would have come over and asked to sit on my lap. This would have killed that rare moment Robert had with him.

There was no anger or malice in his tone, but rather a man just wanting to be involved in his child’s life.

This exchange opened my eyes to times I may have inadvertently taken a moment from him, just because I am “mommy.”

I let the thoughts fade and went into another room to relax so they could have some Father-Son time and honestly, I am glad I didn’t get worked up over Robert’s words.

It is important that my child has a great relationship with his daddy. There are times that I need to just leave the room and give them a chance to bond.

it is hard to distance myself from Tobias. After all, he is my son, but I don’t want to take away a chance for him and Robert to have a strong relationship.

Robert is a great father, and I can see how my presence can take those oh-so-sweet moments with his child away.

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I will do my best to never take moments like this away every again!

❤ Sarah

Fighting For My Mind

Thinking

It is easy to fall into a rut and it doesn’t help when you have lost all motivation to try and climb out of it. In my experience, that is when Satan moves. He begins to whisper in my ear and as much as I try not to listen, I hear it.

He has been whispering…

I’m not worth anything.

I’m unloved and I am unworthy.

And since his games are not new I recognized them, but I wasn’t able to stop them from running ramped.

Over and over I ran those words through my mind and they slowly began attaching themselves.

Does my husband really love me?  

Why does he love me? 

I’m not worthy of love.

Why does God care about me when all I do is screw up?

These thoughts weighed heavy on my heart and they boggled my mind so that I was unable to think of anything that brought joy or clarity. This has been a daily occurrence for weeks and some of the things that happen throughout my day have pushed me deeper into the hole.

The thoughts are still there, lingering in the back of my mind. As I write this I can feel them bubbling up and trying to flood my senses with the failures that have happened over the last few weeks.

But something is different this time — I have chosen to focus on facts and not assumptions.

I know that my God is always good. He loves me and accepts me regardless of my shortcomings.

“He predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will.” – Ephesians 1:5 NIV

A child doesn’t need to earn their parents love, it is just there and God has freely given his love to all of us, it is just up to us to accept it.

I woke up this morning and a sense of understanding washed back all the thoughts that were swirling in my mind.

I am enough and I am His.  Just that one thought liberated me from all the burdens that I had clung to.

Satan is a master at planting thoughts in our minds to make us doubt and we are the masters at using those thoughts to hold us back from the everlasting love of our Abba Father.

You are loved and you are enough.

Always remember that!

❤ Sarah

Challenges

Update on Tobias

Tobias has been sick constantly, and we have been in and out of the doctor’s office and hospital since he has been born. It feels never-ending sometimes.

About a week ago Tobias was admitted into the hospital for an abscess that formed on his neck. Originally it was just a swollen lymph node.

The abscess got so large that my son couldn’t turn his head without being in pain. So surgery was needed to drain the abscess.

Passed out in the hospital crib.
Passed out in the hospital crib.

In an adult, it would be call a minor surgery, but for a 3 month old (4 months now) it is a pretty big deal since they have to put him under.

Tobias did great and healed quickly, but I was a mess. I couldn’t believe that he had to be hospitalized so young.

Tobias after his surgery. He is one tough little guy.
Tobias after his surgery. He is one tough little guy.

Of course there was more going on that we didn’t know. He became resistant to the antibiotics, and there was a mess of doctors and surgeons calling telling us what we needed to do.

The calls lasted for a full week, each time it was a different doctor – talk about a headache. 

Poor kid was on three antibiotics before we got the right one in his system.

Personal Revelation

Life is full of challenges, and problem solving has become a great skill of mine, but throughout this whole process I saw a part of me that I wish didn’t exist.

Selfishness.

Now yes, I care about my son and his well-being, but I couldn’t help thinking about all the bad things that seem to keep happening to me and my family lately.

I will not go into detail because well… it’s the Internet and I am smarter than that! 🙂

The point is I wasn’t letting God be exalted in my life. I was more focused on my own feelings and emotions than on God and what he desires.

It may not seem like that big of a deal to some, but to me discovering this really stopped me in my tracks.

Giving It To God

This process doesn’t happen over night, but it is important that each day I speak aloud, “God, I give it all to you. Your will be done Father.”

Luke 9:23 “Then he said to the crowd, ‘If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me.’”

I truly believe there is power when we speak it out. Just like there is power when we pray scripture.

Every time I pray this I feel the burden being lifted off, and I can see clearly.

This isn’t a process that can be stopped after one day. We as humans are selfish in nature and I know it can be hard to remove the focus from ourselves, especially when society rewards those who are self-seeking and those who work for their own gain.

However, the reward we receive from God is much greater.

He is my joy and my blessing!
He is my joy and my blessing!

Personal Growth

Being challenged isn’t a bad thing. Accepting to get through the challenge breeds good character and forces you to grow as an individual. And I don’t know about you, but I aways want be growing!

I will leave you with some of my favorite quotes that I hope inspire you as much as they inspire me.

C.S. Lewis Eric Bates Seneca Steve Maraboli

Photo quotes from Goodreads

How do you overcome challenges in your life? I am always looking for new ways to view various situations. Please share in the comments below.

~Sarah