Mistakes

“A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.” – George Bernard Shaw (1856 – 1950)

I’m not perfect and honestly, no one is.

Go ahead you can admit it too!

Mistakes will happen and handling them can be a challenge.

I recently made a huge communication no-no by missing a  spelling error on a publication.

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To some, this may not seem like a big deal, but when it’s your boss sending out the documents and catching all the flak for the errors – it can feel like the whole world is crashing down on you in that moment.

I corrected the errors and sent out the correct documents, but that didn’t stop the crushing feelings that I had.

I failed.

The truth though is that my failure can be put behind me. Mistakes happen, they will always happen.

They happen at work, they happen in marriage, heck they even happen when we are trying to be a good parent.

It isn’t the mistake that defines us; it’s how we choose to overcome them.

I was raised to take responsibility for my mistakes. So I apologize for the mistake, I correct the mistake and I do my best to get my emotions in check, which is sometimes the hardest part – no one likes failing.

Really want I want to say is it’s totally fine to mess up, it’s a natural part of life. If we were all perfect we would be boring and we wouldn’t grow.

❤ Sarah

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Struggling

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Recently, I have felt completely depleted and in all honesty I don’t know how I am going to handle this.

It is my own personal issue, yet when I try to discuss it with someone so I can talk my way through it, they always want to fix it for me.

It just shows how much my friends and family care, but they can’t fix it.

Life has a way of beating down on us and if life doesn’t get in the way – I do.

We have all heard the saying that “We are our own worse enemy.” It is true. How do we manage to take something simple and turn it into the most complicated issue on the face of the earth?

I’m a working mother who struggles.

  • I struggle with my appearance.
  • I struggle with my chores, which never seem to end.
  • I struggle to leave my son at daycare.

The struggles can go on and on.

Everyone has struggles and they’re not comparable because we are all at different places in our lives. Yet, we constantly compare our lives to that of others either to bring us down or to make us feel better about our life choices.

That is not how I want to live my life. I’m tired of comparing; it sucks the joy right out of life and makes me feel as though I am a failure. The reality is that I am doing my very best and my son and husband know that.

There is no solution to my struggles except for a change in the way I think (only I can control that) and to give my burdens over to my Abba Father.

“Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; He will never let the righteous be shaken.” Psalms 55:22

For those of you dealing with struggles today, just know you aren’t alone and do your best not to compare yourself to others. Find something that brings you joy and hang on to it. Do not be shaken, stand firm!

I will be hanging on to my little one tonight for he is a great joy to my soul!

Wishing you all the best,

❤ Sarah

Small Victories

Tobias is one of the pickiest eaters I have ever met, and I have met a lot!

Maybe it is because I never let him eat from my plate, or maybe that is just who he is. Either way, I find it to be extremely irritating.

I hear the same advice all the time, “he will eat when he is hungry.”

Yes, I know, but the trick is getting him something he will actually eat when he is hungry!

I have tried switching up meats for him to try, but that never seems to go well. Once he ate a chicken nugget and I was so thrilled I literally jumped up and down.

I looked like an idiot, but I didn’t care.

Guess what! He hasn’t eaten one since then. Of course, he will dip it in the ketchup and lick the ketchup off of the chicken, but he won’t bite into the chicken.

Toddlers!

Need I say more?

We go through the same routine every night when its time for dinner. He runs over to his chair, sits himself down and inspects his plate. Then he will point to each thing given to him and waits for me to tell him what they are.

I have never given him pork, simply because we don’t eat it often in our house, but this night was different and I served him a pork cutlet.

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So he started with his favorite item on the plate; ketchup.

Tobias points at it smiling and I say “that’s ketchup.”

He giggles and moves on.

He always points to the other items that aren’t meat first.I explain what each is as he smiles, but still nothing has gone into his mouth yet.

Finally he gets to the pork. The smile is gone from his face. He points at it and looks up at me.

“That’s pork.”

Now I seem to have gotten his attention. He is now really watching me. He inspects it further and then points again. And again I tell him its pork.

What does he do? He picks it up, smells it and then dips it in the ketchup.

I’m thinking well he we go again, another meal my child won’t eat.

Then it happens, the pork made it into this mouth, and it was the first thing he finished!

He consumed three servings of food that night!

The one thing I put on his plate that I thought he would eat, he ignored. Sorry sweet potatoes.

It isn’t much, but it is a small victory. After two months of him wanting nothing to do with the meals I prepared, he finally ate something!

His stomach was so full that you could see it popping out of his shirt!

Current Score: Tobias: 2,599 —Mom: 1

I’ll still take it!

One Day At A Time

Kids are great, but sometimes you can feel your sanity slipping away. For me, this is especially true when I should be asleep. Every parent can relate, I’m sure!

There is always something to be thankful for.

Last night was one of those nights where all my patience vanished.

Poor Tobias, I know he was tired, but he just couldn’t fall asleep. I tried everything: Rocking, walking with him, letting him cry it out etc.—nothing worked!

Just when I thought things were calming down he would wake back up. You know what I mean, right? You finally find that comfortable position and it’s like they know! As soon as I relaxed–BAM the crying started!

Now typically we would let him fall back asleep on his own, but he was keeping our neighbors awake (the downside to living in an apartment).

I lost my mind last night and parent guilt took over (and yes it truly is a thing).

“What if he is sick?” 

“What if he is teething?” 

“You can’t even calm your own child.”

All these things ran through my head along with…

“I just want sleep.”

“Oh my gosh child, just calm down.” 

“Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!” 

Tobias and I ended up on the couch around 4 am this morning, and finally he fell asleep. Soon after my alarm went off so that I could get everything ready for the day. I had no motivation to move. That is when I looked over at my sleeping, almost two-year-old and whispered “I am indeed blessed.” 

God made children cute for a reason people! So that when you are at your wits end they will do something that you can’t help but smile at. It’s like magic! You can have all your anger built up and then WHAM there is that cute smile and a hug and kiss. Melts my heart.

Parents you know what I am talking about!

Last night it was seeing him finally fall asleep and just knowing that I was entrusted with this strong-willed toddler for a reason. I was chosen to be his mother. And even thought I was sleep deprived I was still on duty.

Psalms 127:3-4 (NIV) “Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth.” 

The old cliché is true, we do have to take it one day at a time and even one moment at a time.

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 With each movement my heart grows a little bigger and my life is a little brighter.

Sarah

 

New Hobby

Life can be stressful.

That being said, it is important to try and have a hobby. Mine was writing short stories and any other form of creative writing, but it takes me a while before I get into the groove of writing. And with my rambunctious toddler, I can typically only dedicate 30 min or so to free writing.

We all know that its the last 5 minutes of free writing when you finally start getting into the real story. So I have sought out other hobbies to relax me and I believe I have finally found one. I will get back to writing soon though, but it is nice to have options.

What is this new hobby? I thought you would never ask. It’s painting! 

Unlike most children who get to enjoy art classes in school, I never really got into it. I attribute most of this to going to a private school who was limited on their art teacher choices, and the fact that I suck at drawing.

Oh well, I have discovered it now, and man does it feel great!

I am still extremely new to painting with acrylics, and  just completed my fourth painting, thanks to the use of Youtube tutorials. 🙂

I know I still have a lot to learn, but that is why I am so excited about this new hobby. I will be sure to post new images when I have them.

Here is my progress thus far (from oldest to newest):

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This is my first painting ever! I had a canvas laying around and just used some craft paint. I know its not any good, but it is what gave me my desire!
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Second painting. Went to a Paint Nite with some girlfriends and came back with this beauty. I know its not perfect, but I am still really proud of what I created with barely any knowledge.
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Third Painting using a tutorial from Youtube by The Art Sharpa. Painting is titled Girl in the Rain. Tutorial is linked below.
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Fourth painting also from a tutorial from The Art Sharpa for the Aurora Borealis. Tutorial linked below.

 

This is what I have been doing to keep my stress levels down. What do you do to handle stress?

Happy Tuesday!

 

❤ Sarah

Off My Game

There are days when things just happen to take me by surprise and then there are days that just throw off my whole world, or so it seems.

When times are tough I tend to live a very structured day. It helps me stay centered and allows me to feel as though I won’t float away. Then something happens and it derails me.

In my mind the train has come off the tracks and about to go over the edge. Some structure and planning is what helps me know it will all be okay.

Some people can just shake off plans changing, others can just adjust and most of the time I can too, but not this time.

My plans were to rely on someone and then they changed. I don’t tend to rely on many people so this really does stop me in my tracks. It makes me feel isolated or rather like I don’t matter enough. The feelings of broken promises and abandonment run ramped through me and I can’t stop all the thoughts that pour into my mind.

As a child, I was lied too quite a bit. It was never on purpose of course, but I didn’t learn that until I was older, but the impact all these broken promises and lies made on me is still evident in my everyday life.

I want to rely on others, but when it isn’t a constant I tend to feel as if I am the failure.

My struggle is deeper than it appears. I have become so use to only relying on myself that I forget to rely on God and I forget to open up about how I feel to my family. This leads to more struggles, more anger and more pain —all from one change in my plans.

Yes, I know to some this may seem crazy, and it isn’t always like this — honest. It just so happens that the season of life I am in with my family is a hard one and so the “small things” end up being the tear that just keeps widening, exposing all the other sensitive areas in my life.

Being aware of my issues is what helps me discover the real reasons as to why I react to things the way I do. It allows me to learn and grown into the woman that I know I am called to be.

After all, you can’t get to where you’re going, unless you know where you have been.

 

3 Ways I Conquer Fear

Fear is normal.

Fear is scary.

I will not let fear control me. As a planner, I try to control way too much. I plan my day, I plan my husband’s day, and of course I plan Tobias’ day. However, the day never goes as planned, and then all of a sudden I become fearful of the unknown.

My fear is what initially drove me to plan.

For the past few years I have been working on just going with the flow and letting things happen organically. Of course, I have failed on many occasions, but being more conscious of my desire to plan has helped.

Personal I find planning fun, but I also find it to be restricting. At work it is great and it is an asset. At home, it is just a distraction. Here are a few things that have helped me let go of my desire to plan while at home.

Find A Focus

BalanceWhen I focus on God and my family I tend to put aside my desire to plan the day. I will occasionally state, “I am not in control. My purpose is to worship and bring glory to God.” This helps me stay centered and to remember that there is a bigger plan at work and I don’t need to plan for God. He has everything under control. One way I do this is through daily meditation on the word and prayer.

If you are someone who is fearful of prayer I would recommend that you start just by reading the word and turning that into a pray. A good place to start is Psalm 91.

“Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” Proverbs 19:21 NIV

Eliminate Distractions

Distraction.jpgThere are so many things that can derail us from enjoying the day. Lets just start with technology. Yes, it is a great tool and I am all for social media and mind-numbing entertainment, but these things can keep us from really enjoying what life has to offer. I am not perfect and I don’t do this as much as I should, but if I am set on spending time with my family and enjoying all the fun moments, I will make sure to ignore my e-mails, stay off Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, so that I can immerse myself into my family and our adventures.

The same can be done with other distractions. Situations may arise that set the tone for the day. Someone woke up angry, frustrated, or just not feeling well. We all have had those days when we receive a call with some not so great news or a situation arises that really throws us of our game; it can be hard to put it all behind us. However, once it is out of the way you will be amazed at how great you feel. For me, I need to say things out loud so that I become more “self-aware,” so I will say something like, “I will not let this ruin my good day,” or “It is in the past and I can’t change the past, I can only change how this affects me.”

Remember You Are Not Alone

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Lack of planning can turn into fear for me rather quickly and it is important that when I become fearful I address it immediately. I do this through talking with God and confiding in my husband. I express my fear and through admitting it, I know I can conquer it.

I often find when I confess my fear that I am not alone, my husband may be dealing with a similar fear or anxiety and together we are able to approach God and find His peace over the situation.

Like I said earlier, I am not perfect and I still fail. Fear is real, but fear can be conquered.

Don’t let fear control you and your life.

Enjoy all the moments that come into your life and remember that each moment leads to you discovering your heart.

Like my Dad always says, “It is what it is!”

 

❤ Sarah